My parents have told me basically every year since I was sixteen years old that we would go to Korea, and in 9 days, I will be there (well, 10 days including flight time).
Finalizing everything for the trip has been hectic amongst final exams and end-of-the-year stress, but I know this will be a life changing journey. We will be in Seoul for most of our stay, then we will travel to Busan, and then back to Seoul for the final part of our trip.
We will tour the adoption agency, eat kimchi, and get a real taste of Korean culture outside of Los Angeles' Korea town.
My dad's best friend since high school, Frank, is Korean and when I was younger, his family would bring me back a hambok when they traveled to Korea. When I was about 7 years old, Matt and I went to a Korea camp to learn more about the culture.
We moved to Thousand Oaks, California from the valley when I was 3 years old. My mom needed her dry cleaning done and she found the cleaners down the street from our house. The couple that does the dry cleaning is Korean, and my mom said that when they spoke Korean to me when I was younger, I would light up. For the past 17 years, they have called me by my given Korean name, Soo Kyung. It turns out that I made such an impression on them that when their son had his first child -- a daughter -- they named her Soo Kyung too.
Since my childhood, Korean culture has since been put on the back burner as American and Jewish culture have become a first priority. Now though, I acknowledge and realize now that I must embrace and study my racial background as well as my cultural background.
Though I know only one word in Korean, "Angyounghaseyo," meaning "hello," I am excited to dive head-first into a culture and a place that brought me into being, a place that created my total existence.
It has not been confirmed yet by the adoption agency, but there is a chance that I will be able to meet my foster mother while I am in Korea. This woman took me into her home and took care of me for the first five months of my life, which I am so grateful for.
Many people ask me if I will want to meet my biological mother while I am there. I have been torn with this question my entire life. My emotions since I was a child have been wishy-washy on the subject, but I have realized that I would not like to meet my biological mother while I am there. I have had only four dreams in my life where I have woken up crying. One is from my childhood, and all I can remember from that night is my biological mother was in my dream.
I am appreciative and thankful that she had the courage to give me up in order for me to have a better life. From my background papers, I have learned that her living situation was not ideal. She was a high school drop out that was working to help pay the bills and had a one night stand. This woman carried me for 9 months, she brought me into this world, and yet -- 20 years later, I don't feel a connection with her. Maybe I'll feel differently when I have a child.
As the trip sharply rounds the corner, I have looked online at Korean customs to know before arriving, I have attempted to learn Korean through a YouTube channel (didn't help), and I am packing up my house here in Tucson for the summer.
I can't wait to be a majority in a country, it'll be weird for my parents, but I have realized over all my travels that no matter where I go in Western society, I will always be a minority. In 9 days, that will all change.
I'm packing up my room in Tucson and I'm realizing that I am ending my junior year of college, and my life is just about to begin.
Until next time,
Meryl
We moved to Thousand Oaks, California from the valley when I was 3 years old. My mom needed her dry cleaning done and she found the cleaners down the street from our house. The couple that does the dry cleaning is Korean, and my mom said that when they spoke Korean to me when I was younger, I would light up. For the past 17 years, they have called me by my given Korean name, Soo Kyung. It turns out that I made such an impression on them that when their son had his first child -- a daughter -- they named her Soo Kyung too.
Since my childhood, Korean culture has since been put on the back burner as American and Jewish culture have become a first priority. Now though, I acknowledge and realize now that I must embrace and study my racial background as well as my cultural background.
Though I know only one word in Korean, "Angyounghaseyo," meaning "hello," I am excited to dive head-first into a culture and a place that brought me into being, a place that created my total existence.
It has not been confirmed yet by the adoption agency, but there is a chance that I will be able to meet my foster mother while I am in Korea. This woman took me into her home and took care of me for the first five months of my life, which I am so grateful for.
Many people ask me if I will want to meet my biological mother while I am there. I have been torn with this question my entire life. My emotions since I was a child have been wishy-washy on the subject, but I have realized that I would not like to meet my biological mother while I am there. I have had only four dreams in my life where I have woken up crying. One is from my childhood, and all I can remember from that night is my biological mother was in my dream.
I am appreciative and thankful that she had the courage to give me up in order for me to have a better life. From my background papers, I have learned that her living situation was not ideal. She was a high school drop out that was working to help pay the bills and had a one night stand. This woman carried me for 9 months, she brought me into this world, and yet -- 20 years later, I don't feel a connection with her. Maybe I'll feel differently when I have a child.
As the trip sharply rounds the corner, I have looked online at Korean customs to know before arriving, I have attempted to learn Korean through a YouTube channel (didn't help), and I am packing up my house here in Tucson for the summer.
I can't wait to be a majority in a country, it'll be weird for my parents, but I have realized over all my travels that no matter where I go in Western society, I will always be a minority. In 9 days, that will all change.
I'm packing up my room in Tucson and I'm realizing that I am ending my junior year of college, and my life is just about to begin.
Until next time,
Meryl
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